Thursday, April 30, 2009

Live action interactive drama

This after I had a very strange experience. I was wandering round a freebie shop with a friend when a conversation broke out. We took a seat. It all happened something a bit like this: (To read this is kinda helps if you imagine us watching TV, commenting on it as we watch it. Kinda)

[19:40] Tom G: hey bitch
[19:40] Kira S: you talking to me ?
[19:41] Rosa S turns around "He better not be talking to me..thats all I know"
[19:41] Tom G: wadup big booty bitch?
[19:41] Marnix Malifozik: i think it's not you, Rosa
[19:41] Kira S: oh hell nah, i don't think so
[19:41] Marnix Malifozik: does
my bum look big in this?
[19:42] Rosa S eyes get wide and she giggles "A little"
[19:42] Marnix Malifozik: you're charming, lass
[19:42] Tom G: ty
[19:42] Marnix Malifozik: you know how to hurt a tiger's feelings
[19:42] Rosa S grins wide "You knows you loves it!"
[19:42] Marnix Malifozik: you're very full of yourself since you got engaged aren't ya? ;)
[19:42] Tom G: I loves me some white women
[19:43] Kira S shoves Tom...
[19:43] Tom G: ain't that right hoe
[19:43] Kira S: who you think you are talking to bitch?
[19:43] Kira S: i ain't no ho and i sure as hello ain't yo ho
[19:43] Tom G: I'll fuck you too
[19:43] Marnix Malifozik thinks they're about to get it on here and now
[19:44] Rosa S busts out laughing "Yea well....thats what happens" then she gasps and leans down to Marnix and whispers "I think the girl is winning this fight"
[19:44] Marnix Malifozik: it will end up in nekkidness, i can tell
[19:44] Tom G: you wanna watch us?
[19:44] Rosa S giggles and elbows Marnix gently in his tiger ribs
[19:45] Marnix Malifozik: thanks, but no thanks. hell no thanks
[19:46] Kira S: damn Tom, smile, i can't see you
[19:46] Tom G: you don't need to see me
[19:46] Rosa S sits down with her pet tiger and takes out some popcorn "This is better than SL TV"
[19:46] Marnix Malifozik wonders if the show has finished
[19:46] Marnix Malifozik coughs..."pet?"
[19:47] Tom G: Ima go deep up in ya guts tonight girl
[19:47] Marnix Malifozik wonders if that line ever works
[19:47] Kira S: i want to see you black ass in a noose
[19:47] Kira S: whatchu think about that?
[19:47] Marnix Malifozik is glad racism is alive and well
[19:47] Rosa S gasps and covers Marnix's ears "This is not fer little tiger ears :o"
[19:48] Tom G: you need to shut your mouth bitch
[19:48] Marnix Malifozik: do you think they're IMing secret love messages, Rosa?
[19:48] Rosa S: XD HUSH MARNIX!
[19:48] Tom G: and go make me some mo money
[19:48] Kira S: nice come back you uneduacted fool
[19:48] Kira S: i ain't yo ho
[19:48] Kira S: i din't know how many time i got to tell you dat. i gots me a man
[19:49] Marnix Malifozik decides to hang around malls more ofen if this is the level of entertainment
[19:49] Rosa S gasps and eats some popcorn "This is the part where she reveals she carrying his baby"
[19:49] Tom G: ain't wad ya told me last night
[19:49] Kira S: what i told you last night was "is it in yet" and "what do you mean you are done already"
[19:50] Tom G: watch while i whip this out
[19:50] Tom G: HAHAHA
[19:50] Kira S whips out her magnifying glass
[19:50] Marnix Malifozik: please don't do that
[19:50] Rosa S busts out in laughter "THIS IS GETTING GOOD MARNIX!"
[19:50] Kira S: you noob, you ain't got no pixels yet
[19:50] Kira S: lmao
[19:50] Marnix Malifozik wants wants to see what happens next
[19:50] Tom G: yous knows us niggas have it HUGE
[19:51] Rosa S snorts "I wonder if they are gonna have a shotgun wedding?"
[19:51] Kira S: i know MOST niggas got it huge
[19:51] Marnix Malifozik: i am so blogging this conversation later, Rosa ;)
[19:51] Rosa S: ROFL
[19:51] Kira S: what you got is smaller than yo mama's dick
[19:52] Tom G: and now we rule the world beotch
[19:52] Marnix Malifozik: it's too good for the world not to share in it's glory
[19:52] Rosa S munches on some popcorn then rubs Marnix's tummy
[19:52] Kira S: you don't rule nuthin but your watermelon patch
[19:52] Kira S: and your crack house
[19:52] Marnix Malifozik thinks this is heading towards a drive-by
[19:53] Tom G: you fucking racist bitch
[19:53] Rosa S gasps "ohh...good one!"
[19:53] Kira S: you is the one calling me a ho....and a white might as well call me cracker
[19:53] Kira S: you came up to me busta
[19:53] Tom G: ok
[19:53] Rosa S secreatly tosses a AK-47 between the two "this is about to get really good Marnix"
[19:53] Kira S: starting yo shit
[19:54] Kira S: oh no he didn't!
[19:54] Kira S: i'm show you cracker mo fo\
[19:54] Kira S: you don't want no Kira on yo ass.
[19:54] Rosa S eyes get wide "This is better than CABLE!"
[19:54] Tom G: shut up and put my balls in yo mouth
[19:54] Kira S: what balls?
[19:55] Kira S: is what i'm saying
[19:55] Rosa S gasps "Ohh....burn"
[19:55] Kira S: you ain't got none
[19:55] Kira S: homey
[19:55] Rosa S leans over to Marnix...."Who you thinks winning?"
[19:55] Marnix Malifozik wonders where his chat log is saved
[19:55] Kira S: why don't you go collect your sl "welfare check" and buy yourself some
[19:55] Marnix Malifozik: erm what, sorry?
[19:56] Marnix Malifozik: oh, erm, the one on the left...
[19:56] Tom G: ain't wad yo was saying when yo was sucking my dick fo some crack
[19:56] Marnix Malifozik: sorry, i was reading the paper
[19:56] Kira S: that was yo mama, not me
[19:56] Kira S: i ain't one of your crack hos
[19:56] Rosa S eyes get wide and starts to yell and waves her arms in the air "YOU MISSING ALL THIS DRAMA!?"
[19:56] Kira S: quit smoking your own product ...
[19:57] Kira S: and get some teeth
[19:57] Marnix Malifozik: i'll catch it on the re-run
[19:57] Tom G: beotch, I'll slap you like a good pimp should
[19:57] Kira S: those diamonds on your ear lobes or crack rocs?
[19:58] Marnix Malifozik: now, Rosa, tell me, are they flirting yet? I can't keep up
[19:58] Kira S: you an't no pimp. just a busta on a street corner, laying pretend
[19:58] Rosa S eats some popcorn and talks with her mouth full "you lucky tiger...I dont have SL DVR..."
[19:59] Rosa S blinks and goes silent then hold the popcorn infront of him trying to change the subject "uhhh..popcorn?"
[19:59] Tom G: why you bow legged?
[19:59] Kira S: from riding a REAL MAN
[19:59] Kira S: why you bowlegged?
[19:59] Kira S: same reason?
[20:00] Rosa S leans back and snapps her fingers "DAAAANNMMM"
[20:01] Tom G: so did you two enjoy the show?
[20:01] Kira S: lol
[20:01] Marnix Malifozik: mmmm, it tailed off a bit towards the end
[20:01] Rosa S blinks and leans over "is the TV show talking to us now?"
[20:01] Kira S: my fingers hurt
[20:01] Marnix Malifozik: i was expecting more explosions
[20:01] Rosa S: 0.o
[20:01] Kira S: well we are in a no push area
[20:02] Rosa S: HAHA
[20:02] Kira S: not much for "fireworks"
[20:02] Kira S: lol
[20:02] Rosa S drops her popcorn and begins to clap "THAT WAS FING AWSOME!"
[20:02] Kira S: lol
[20:02] Marnix Malifozik is going to blog it right up to that bit where it stopped
[20:02] Kira S takes Tom's hand and takes a bow
So it was all an act after all. A twenty minute live-action play. I didn't see that coming. I wonder if they tour all the noob malls playing out dumb-ass arguments for on-watchers.

Just after I had that I made a very distressing discovery.

From the look of it, it's cousin Ralph. He went missing about six months and Uncle Bernard and Aunt Meg suspected something like this. He was always hanging about with a bad crowd. We knew he'd come to a bad end. Ever since that Christmas he brought those hunters home to meet the family.


  1. you funny boy :-D That was hilarious

  2. I was just part of the audience.
    The real plaudits must go to the white trash

  3. *falls down laughing*

    I held it together until poor Uncle Ralph! XD


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